A Fen of Our Times

TMN is proud to present the following interview with Fen Vice President Largo, conducted by Illora Mone.

Lardo?

Illora Mone asks, "so Largo, is your full name what I keep hearing people call you, or are they being cruel?"
(Largo looks concerned.)
Largo asks, "What are people calling me?"
Illora Mone says, "Lardo von Lardovicowtz"
(Largo grins.)
Largo says, "That's just Astral Duck's nickname for me."
Largo says, "My full name is "Largo"."
Illora Mone says, "he's the one I hear calling you that too"
Largo says, "Just Largo."

Illora Mone asks, "does marriage confer a new name?"
Largo says, "I didn't keep my ex's name, if that's what you mean."
Illora Mone says, "just wondering if there's a way to tell if you're married"
Largo says, "Asking is a good way! Or checking for a ring."
Illora Mone says, "true"
Illora Mone says, "seems so ..... intrusive though"

Largo's Clan

Illora Mone asks, "so Largo, is your clan an old clan?"
Largo asks, "Old?"
Largo says, "I guess, relatively."
Largo says, "It's been around longer than I've been in the lands."
Illora Mone asks, "how were you recruited?"
Largo says, "I asked to join. After a while, they let me in."
Illora Mone asks, "what was it about Bane that drew you?"
Largo says, "The goals. Dar'shak are a serious menace that are very often ignored."
Illora Mone says, "they can be easily overshadowed, despite their constant presence in town"
Largo says, "Too few people show any real interest in what are arguably are worst enemies."
Largo says, "Sure, thugs aren't a huge problem."
Largo asks, "But what about when the necromancers start pulling out greater deaths?"
Illora Mone asks, "I saw a lot of skulls in the way to Scarmis. Are they GDs in waiting?"
Largo says, "Uh. I think those are just skulls."
Illora Mone says, "they almost look like they're inactive, in storage"
Largo says, "I guess anything's possible, but I'm pretty sure they're just skulls."
Illora Mone says, "a grim reminder of what lies in wait."
Largo says, "Or just some dead person's head."
Illora Mone says, "some rather big dead person's head"
Largo says, "Okay."

Fending Off the Darshak

Illora Mone asks, "so, Largo, how many Darshak attacks have you thwarted since you joined?"
(Largo shrugs.)
Illora Mone asks, "they attack so frequently?"
Largo says, "Several, I guess. But I can't take credit for any of it."
Illora Mone asks, "What do the Darshak want? Why do they attack us?"
Largo says, "Several reasons."
Largo says, "We're too close to the temple. We kill their little foot soldiers all the time."
Illora Mone asks, "Are we as great a threat to them as they are to us?"
Largo says, "Only if we work together."
Largo says, "On that note, Bane is in fact looking for a few more members."
Illora Mone says, "seems kind of a difficult task, when we change population so quickly"
Largo says, "Interested parties should contact a member."
Illora Mone asks, "who are your members?"
Largo says, "There are only a few of us currently."
Largo says, "Indigo, Luna, Tserr'tsee, Aravir, Hex, Andarius. Me, of course."
Largo says, "Diana D'fey."
Illora Mone says, "I've not seen Aravir since Scabfoot washed up on shores"
Largo says, "As far as I know, he's on an extended break in the library."
Illora Mone says, "pity Scabfoot can't join, he sounds like a natural"
Illora Mone says, "he certainly is a relentless fighter of the Darshak"
Largo says, "I'll be frank. I don't trust Scabfoot any further than I can throw him."
Largo says, "Which isn't very far."
Illora Mone says, "he came to help us when they invaded last time I saw"
Largo says, "We can't trust just anyone who walks up and says they're on our side, especially if they're known to periodically turn into undine."
Illora Mone says, "but he didn't just say it, he fought to falling many times"
(Largo shrugs.)
Illora Mone asks, "was the Necromancer a Darshak?"
Largo says, "Yes."
Largo says, "Once again, though."
Largo says, "Bane is looking for more people interesting in combatting the Dar'shak menace. If any interested parties read this, contact one of us in the lands."

Fen Presidential Politics

Illora Mone asks, "are you planning to run for president yourself, or with Manx?"
Largo says, "when election time rolls around again, I'd like to try to run for president myself."
Illora Mone asks, "Do you expect much competition?"
Largo says, "It depends on who runs."
Illora Mone asks, "is running by nomination, or by choice?"
Largo says, "Nomination, I think."
Largo thinks, "Nope. I'm okay."
Illora Mone asks, "given any thought to your campaign promises?"
Largo says, "I'd really like to see some more attention given to the Puddleby Police Department, and Noivad, the sherrif."
Illora Mone says, "he recently added more deputies, I think"
(Largo nods.)
Illora Mone asks, "what attention are you considering?"
Largo says, "They don't have enough authority. They aren't even officially recognized as an affiliation."
Illora Mone exclaims, "they're not?!"
Largo says, "I'd like to work on that."
Illora Mone says, "sounds like a worthwhile goal."
Largo says, "I've also given a lot of thought to the kissing-babies-and-marching-in-parades part of my platform."
Illora Mone asks, "speaking of babies, how's Figwit?"
Largo says, "He's growing up fast. Quite a handful sometimes."
Illora Mone says, "sounds like a baby, all right."
Largo says, "He's not really a baby anymore."
Illora Mone asks, "aren't they always babies, though?"
Illora Mone says, "to their parents, I mean"
Largo says, "I guess."

Style

Illora Mone says, "I see you've been wearing the green shirt more often now."
Illora Mone asks, "retiring the tan one?"
Largo says, "It's not tan, it's orange."
Largo says, "And I'm not retiring it."
Largo asks, "Aren't I allowed to have more than one change of clothes?"
Illora Mone says, "maybe, maybe not"
Illora Mone says, "changing color confuses me, that's how I recognize people."
Largo says, "No matter what color shirt I'm wearing, you can always recognise my by my pretty face."
Largo exclaims, "Next question!"
Largo ponders, "Recognize me, even."
Illora Mone asks, "what have you noticed about fashion lately?"
Largo says, "It's taking a dangerous turn towards purple."
Illora Mone says, "I've noticed that."
Illora Mone says, "I think it's MaryJane's fault."
Illora Mone ponders, "she gave me purple once"
Illora Mone says, "sometimes, there's so much purple, tc looks striped"
Largo says, "Sometimes, there's so much purple, I wish I was blind."
Illora Mone asks, "is purple better than bright pink?"
Largo says, "That's like asking if I'd rather have my eyes salted and pulled out with rusty pliers, or one of my arms severed over a period of several hours by being gnawed on by rats."
Illora Mone asks, "are there any good colors, then?"
Largo says, "There's no such thing as a bad color."
Illora Mone ponders, "a purple miniskirt might look nice"
Largo says, "Even purple looks okay when Relkin wears it."
Illora Mone asks, "what if everyone wore green?"
Largo says, "If everyone wore green, I think I'd get really tired of green. But it still wouldn't be as bad as purple."
Illora Mone says, "why is purple so unpleasant to you in large quantities, if you don't mind me asking"
Largo says, "It's not the color so much as what seems to be an obnoxious culture developing around it."
Illora Mone asks, "the purple haze?"
Largo says, "Don't get me wrong, I like Tina, I like Maryjane."
Largo says, "But they're beating a dead horse at this point."
Largo says, "Every time you sunstone something about purple, I die a little more inside."
Illora Mone says, "I wonder why there is an obsession about purple."
Illora Mone asks, "is it because it's easy to get, if you're female?"
Largo says, "I don't know what the attraction is."
Illora Mone asks, "does your clan watch only the Darshak, or are you also watching the Orga threat?"
Largo says, "Dar'shak are our prime concern."
Largo says, "And, uh, speaking of that, I have a meeting I need to get to."
Illora Mone asks, "I remember reading in Azrael's scrolls a long ways back about the Darshak trading in slaves, has that been stopped?"
Largo says, "Unlikely. But I really need to run."
Illora Mone exclaims, "thanks for talking to me!"
Largo says, "Thank you for the interview, and I'll see you around."
(Largo waves!)

He brings another day, another night, another fight
Well, there's another day done and there's another gone by
He's a fen of our times, a fen of our times
Tonight, tonight, oh he's burning bright

(with apologies to Genesis)

Posted by Para at February 22, 2007 11:18 PM